Ron's True Love - A Humiliating Truth
by BlindJedi
Summary: Ron finds his true love, much to the amusement of the rest of the school. Ron lovers, be warned!


Ooooh, I am feeling evil today  
  
I'm sure if flames are literal, I'll be a charred cinder in a couple of hours.  
  
I don't own the characters and can't afford to pay if I'm sued.   
  
Ron's True Love - A Humiliating Discovery  
  
Probably AU.  
  
_ _ _ _ _  
  
But not definitely.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Ron Weasley strode angrily through the halls of Hogwarts. Humiliation and rage battled for dominance inside him.  
  
How many times will I be rejected, he wondered desperately for what seemed like the hundredth time that day.  
  
this particular rejection had been suffered at the hands of the beautiful Quidditch Chaser, Alicia Spinnet. IT was almost time for the end of the year dance and Ron had been trying to find a date for almost three weeks now. Every day, he determined to ask someone different, only to be turned down in no uncertain terms. Most of the rejections had been accompanied by a half-concealed smirk or a completely open look of revulsion. He couldn't understand it to save his life. He was nearly two meters tall with a somewhat rounded complexion topped off by the distinguished Weasley mop of red hair. He knew he wasn't the most handsome person in the school, but he still had no idea why he was so repulsive to members of the opposite sex.  
  
Ron continued to wallow in his thoughts as his feet wandered seemingly of their own accord down the winding flights of stairs, through the grand entrance hall, and out in to the late autumn sun. Only when he heard a soft snuffling greeting did he snap out of his depression enough to take note of his surroundings.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Harry Potter was in heaven. There was no other way to describe it. His godfather, Sirius, had presented him with the neatest Muggle gadget he had ever seen. IT was a video camera . he knew that to the ordinary Muggle, even Dudley the butterball, video cameras were nothing out of the norm. However, this camera was different. It took pictures and those pictures could be sent back to a computer equipped with a receiver and viewed or edited on said computer.  
  
Harry had been walking around the castle all morning, talking to people, taking pictures, and letting his girlfriend, Hermione Granger, watch at his computer and save those pictures that would be intriguing to the student body at Hogwarts. the plan was to create a video to show at the end of the school year before they graduated.  
  
Seventh year! Was it already seventh year, Harry wondered in disbelief, as he absent-mindedly caught a picture of Snape with a finger jammed up his nose, probably digging for the illusive gold piece. That would definitely be a picture to save, he knew at once.  
  
Growing bored with the indoors, Harry exited the castle and strolled across the beautiful grounds, stopping long enough to talk to Hagrid as the giant made his way in to the school to meet with Professor Dumbledore about a new creature he wanted to introduce to his sixth year students.  
  
Harry continued onward, panning the wonderful camera around to get many different views of the well-kept lawns and gently swaying trees. As he continued on, walking in a wide circle around Hagrid's cottage, he suddenly stopped cold, intrigued by what he saw.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Ron had forgotten about Buckbeak. Buckbeak had been the source of much heart break for his friend, Hagrid, back in their third year when the hippogriff had been sentenced to death for nipping Malfoy on the finger. However, his best friends at the time, Harry and Hermione, had risked themselves and saved the creature along with Sirius Black, the man who had been convicted of betraying Harry's parents to Lord Voldemort as well as killing over a dozen people with a single spell.   
  
Now that Sirius had been cleared, Buckbeak too had been pardoned and allowed to return to Hagrid, which made the gentle giant happier than anyone had ever seen him.  
  
Now, as Buckbeak's gentle greeting broke him out of his self-doubt, Ron was surprised to see that he had wandered all the way to the back of Hagrid's cabin where the hippogriff stayed. For the first time that day, the boy smiled as he jogged over to the hippogriff. He gave a short bow which the animal promptly returned. It was as Ron placed a hand on the broad shoulder of the magnificent creature, that a realization struck him full force. It was both terrifying and exhilarating.  
  
Ron Weasley, hothead extraordenaire, sometimes rash and reckless, and always quick-tempered, had found his soul mate. Feeling the powerful muscles bunching under his hand, noting the broad sweeping wings over the griff's shoulders and the gentle nature of Buckbeak, Ron finally accepted the truth. Unaware of the pair of eyes that were suddenly watching him, wide with consternation, Ron leaned closer to the face of the intense blue-eyed hippogriff.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
"Oh my God!"  
  
Hermione's gasped scream was enough to make almost every pair of eyes in the Hogwarts library swing her way, not to mention a few admonishments to be quiet. Hermione ignored them all, so intent was she on the crystal clear image that was being transmitted to Harry's computer. She had been alternately studying for her O.W.L.S.'s and watching Harry take the digital pictures with his camera, even going so far as to save the occasional picture that caught her fancy. Now, however, her books and other study materials were forgotten as she watched with fascinated horror as Ron Weasley, the immature hothead and formerly one of her best friends, was . . .  
  
Again, she made an audible noise. This time, however, it wasn't a scream. It was a howl of laughter. This time, students in the library began walking over to her table to see what was so funny.  
  
"What's going on," Dean Thomas, a fellow Gryfindor student asked her in puzzlement as he sauntered over to her table.  
  
"Granger, if you're going to start making mating calls in the middle of the day, please go elsewhere!" That bit of wisdom came from Draco Malfoy. Hermione ignored his comment, so caught up by the events in front of her that she forgot to even be angered by Malfoy.  
  
"Hermione, what . . ." That was as far as Seamus Finnigan got before he was able to catch a glimpse of the sickeningly humorous events that were taking place.  
  
Buckbeak was agitated to say the least. The hippogriff was busy turning his head from side to side and stamping his paws in annoyance. One glimpse at the figure kneeling beside the hippogriff was enough to tell why. Ron Weasley was leaning toward the hippogriff, following its frantic facial movements as rapidly as he could. Even from the obscure angle of the camera, it was easy enough to see that Ron was trying to kiss the creature. If the camera would have been able to catch a glimpse of his eyes, a look of suppressed longing and desire would have been very prominent.  
  
"So big and powerful," the camera and its extremely amused wielder heard. "I wish I could be like you someday."  
  
Ron finally managed to plant a small kiss on the hippogriff's drooling mouth.  
  
Harry Potter doubled over with silent laughter, barely retaining enough presence of mind to keep the camera pointed in the right direction.  
  
Hermione and the dozen students and one Potions Master who were now watching were more fortunate. They didn't even have to attempt to quell their laughter, and it is to be certain that the walls of that hallowed room had never rang with such mirth before. It is equally certain that no student had ever before seen Professor Severus Snape double over in laughter, clutching his belly with tears streaming down his cheeks.  
  
And Buckbeak?  
  
Buckbeak had tolerated the human's crazy behavior as he had kept his face next to the hippogriff's. However, when he dared to plant a kiss on Buckbeak's mouth, Buckbeak's annoyance gave way to anger. It was all very well if a human wanted to ride him, but the smell coming off the small creature next to him told the hippogriff that riding in the traditional sense was the last thing that this particular human wanted. And that, friends and neighbors, was too much. After all, the hippogriff reasoned in his slow fashion, he at least stuck to members of his own species. The creature would have to be taught a lesson.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
For Ron Weasley, the quiet moment of contented bliss following his successful kiss was interrupted by an agony unlike anything he had ever known, followed quickly and mercifully by blackness.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Harry's eyes widened with sympathy and horror as Buckbeak made a quick and decisive move in Ron's direction. He was quickly forced to turn away before becoming violently sick. His turn was almost fast enough to avoid seeing the jaws working on whatever had been bitten. That decided him as his lunch came back up in a sudden and violent heave.  
  
When he was able to recover himself, he switched off his camera, eliciting some groans of protest from his secret audience, and ran over to where Ron lay crumpled, a pool of blood forming on the ground beneath him. Keeping a wary eye on the hippogriff, Harry took out his wand, conjured a stretcher, and was finally able to muscle Ron on to it. Just as he finished, Professors Snape and McGonagall rushed up, the former with a sneer of contempt and cold laughter still bubbling in his eyes.  
  
"We'll take it from here, Potter," Snape said. "I'm sure that Weasbeak will be back to normal in no more than a few weeks." He chuckled coldly, seemingly amused by his own nickname for the unfortunate Ron.  
  
"By the way, Potter," McGonagall spoke for the first time. "I'm taking two hundred points from Gryfindor for spying on another's misfortunes and having the nerve to broadcast it so that others could view it as well."  
  
The terror that Harry felt was only increased when Snape next spoke.  
  
"Minerva, only two hundred points? I would think Potter's punishment would be increased a bit. At least a suspension should take place. Perhaps being forced to wait until next year to graduate would finally cure Potter of his nosy habits."  
  
Snape took a moment to pause before adding, "on the other hand, Potter has amused me so much today that I think an exception could be made this once. Yes, that's it." he turned back to Harry, and for the first and only time during Harry's stay at Hogwarts, he saw a genuine smile crease the greasy features of the Potions Master.  
  
"Yes, I think that is a good idea," he continued, speaking almost to himself. "I am awarding Gryfindor two hundred and fifty points for coming up with the best source of amusement I have ever seen at this school."  
  
And that, was that.  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Ron Weasley never graduated from Hogwarts. The shame and humiliation was entirely too much. he had recovered from the attack by the provoked hippogriff after several weeks and numerous growth charms performed on him. His ability to look anyone in the eyes was forever gone. Also, and most embarrassing of all to the young red head, his voice would never have the same masculine tones again. And as for his ability to get dates, that too was forever shot, or bitten as the case may be.  
  
Very little more is known of Ronald Weasley. His family has refused to give us any more details as to the fate of their unfortunate son. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley look old and sad, Ginny just prattles on in her usual clueless manner, and the twins just make picture-taking motions and grin. There was a rumor that Ronald Weasley entered Durmstrang and graduated from this dubious school. It has even been hinted at in the wizarding world that a tall red haired young man has been spotted drunk on more than one occasion and babbling things like "oh Beaky, what a team we would have made," and other such nonsense. However, of this tragic young man, no more at this time is currently known.  
  
The End 


End file.
